For weeks I just haven’t had the words to say. Recounting all of this trip has left me at somewhat of a loss, a standstill. I am a man that has many troubles, as most do, and a lot more to learn.
In and out of alcohol fueled rants I mange to string together enough thoughts and feelings for somewhat of a recollection of this journey. Far from over and far from my final—not yet determined—destination, I’ll leave you with a messy compilation of brain spew…
Medellín, for better or worse, grew on me.
Like anything good, it just can’t last forever. This is not to say it didn’t teach me anything; because what it taught me is more valuable than gold.
The bass hits hard. Everyone around me is probably on some illect substance.
Medellin has, over the years, become a party city. Earned the ranks with the likes of Berlin, Prague along with others. Where someone could fit a minute escape into their everyday life.
For the most part this city, and this country, has a bad reputation. To say it is a party place. Well, that might be insulting. The people are the most friendly I’ve ever encountered. The food is good, and the views—incredible.
I’ve gotten sucked into this city.
She draws me in and grabs hold.
Maybe I have even fallen in love just a little bit but like with any fleeting relationship—I have to move on. This city of eternal spring has taught some important lessons to me over the last two weeks. A lot of inner conflict has been scuffed out here. If I can gather one thing from the time here it is this…
Fuck small talk. Give me intimacy.
Let’s talk about how we feel. Give me raw hard emotions, your opinions, your deepest, darkest fears.
I am way too open but that is what you get with me. It is the person I am. I love too fucking hard and too fucking fast.
I went on this trip to find something I lost, I may not even know what that is; but I am going to find out at some point.
It’s been 21 days since I left the states. 6 or so weeks since I quit my job, and maybe 14 days since I felt completely vulnerable. A shinning shimmer of hope and love came my way — so I rode the wave. I don’t regret a thing. It hurts, but I don’t regret a thing. Sometimes you have to trust people, and oftentimes they let you down. I won’t stop loving.
There are pieces of my heart scattered all around the world at this point. I’ve met so many people and seen so much.
Yet, I think that is what life is about. It’s about showing people what is inside your heart. Being vulnerable to everything life has to offer.
As I follow this path to enlightenment, I know I am not alone. As alone as I may feel when I’m surrounded by people that truly love me, I do know, I am not alone.
Life is pain, but sometimes, with a glimmer of hope. You are happy.
And for that moment, well, that is why we live.
Thank you, Medellin. You showed me things I’ll take to my grave.